From the Bars to the Pews

{I am a Woman of the Well}

If you had told me 10 years ago, I’d be working for a church someday, I would have laughed. In your face. SO HARD.

Because 10 years ago, I was the girl all you “church girls” were praying for.
10 years ago I thought Christianity was boring and narrow-minded.
10 years ago, I was really only consumed with one thing, partying.
10 years ago, the greatest joy in my life was going out, having fun, drinking, dancing, whatever! Sure I made time for work & school, but that wasn’t what my life centered around.

Until God gripped my heart.
Until I lost my earthly father.
Until I wandered into a place called “The Well”.

A place where I could sneak in to the back of the dark church, sit in the last pew, try to go unnoticed by others, and hide.


Only to be found in Christ.
A place where someone invited me to hear the Truth I didn’t even know I need to hear.
A place where my sin was confronted and His grace was made real.

The story of The Woman at the Well in John 4 never gets old. She was just going about her business in the middle of the day, filling up her jug of water at the Well. Scandalous past, naïve about her faith, not sure of the man she just stumbled upon.

Only to realize as He began to talk with her, He was the real deal. He was the Messiah! He confronted her sin, he corrected her theology, and revealed Himself to her. She understood and was so excited, that she left her jug right there, and ran into the village to tell everyone who she just found!

He offered her Truth & Grace.
She responded in gratitude and obedience.

And as a result “Many Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman's testimony. . .” (John 4:39)

May that be true of us.
May we be brave enough to listen and hear.
Brave enough to believe.
Brave enough to repent and be saved.
Brave enough to go and tell.

10 years later, I am a church girl. The Well is my home.
10 years later, Christianity is the biggest thrill of my life.
10 years later I am still consumed with One thing.
But that One thing is knowing God, and making Him known.

I am thankful to know what it means to be a Woman of the Well (literally and figuratively). I’m grateful to have had my sin pointed out, because it showed my need for a Savior and led me to His love and grace. I am thankful because I’m no longer living in bondage to alcohol, living in shame, living lost.

And there is no other place I’d rather be found . . . than in Him.

“The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and covered up. Then in his joy he goes and sells all that he has and buys that field. (Matthew 13:44)

“Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ…” (Philippians 3:8-9)

Failed Miserably

Hey, remember that one time 90 of us women set out to read the Old Testament and we failed miserably?



We tried really hard.
We started off really good.
We met together, encouraged each other, felt proud of ourselves when we finished the first few books.

And then things got real.
It started getting harder.
Overwhelming.
Too much.
The task was too big.
The goal was too far to reach.
Life started happening.

We stopped reading.
We stopped meeting.
We stopped trying.

And then we started to fall off, one by one.
We were left feeling defeated, deflated, and well, like failures.

But wait . . . is that really failure?
Isn’t the whole point of the Old Testament to show us our need?
Our need for a Savior?
Our need for a Helper?
Our need for something more?

If you felt like you set a goal you just couldn’t attain this semester, good.
If you felt like you fell short, then good.
If you felt like you couldn’t do it in your own strength, good!

Then you understand.
You understand how we can’t do things in our own strength.
Even good things.

You understand we can never live up to the text.
It’s too much.
Too overwhelming.
Too far.

We can never fully reach God. And that’s why He came down to reach us.

So maybe in this place of feeling like a failure, in feeling like you fell short, in feeling like you just couldn’t really measure up, you’ve actually found success? You’ve found the foundation to the Christian faith!

Not being good enough.

So don’t look at this as a failure. If you set out to read every single chapter of the Old Testament, and didn’t, good. That means the taste of salvation is sweet to your lips, because you know. If you set out to read every chapter, and didn’t, but read more than ever before, then great! That means you’ve tasted and seen what is good and know God more!

I hope that for those of us who didn’t finish the reading this semester, we can begin to see just how beautiful His grace is instead of how awful our inadequacies are!

“23 For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, 24 and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus” (Romans 3:23-24)

“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” (Matthew 5:3)

Journey through the Old Testament

This year, our church is teaching an overview of the bible in a series titled “Generations”. 15 of us ladies from life group decided to read along with the teaching team and set a goal of finishing the Old Testament by June!



It was a lofty goal, and we were far from perfect, but we did it! We met every week to discuss the reading and/or sermon. I don’t know if any of us read every single chapter, but we certainly completed more bible reading in 5 months than we’ve done in the past 5 years!

Most of the women in our life group have not read through the entire Old Testament before (especially not at such a rapid pace). It’s not my style to read so quickly through the bible, but because it’s a big picture/overview, I learned some new things along the way.

Some major themes I picked up on reading through the Old Testament like this were:

Idolatry
Throughout Israel’s history, you see them constantly looking to “other gods”, other things for fulfillment. Over and over they kept offering sacrifices at the “high places” to Baal, and ALSO worshipping YHWH. Finally, in 1 Kings 18 Elijah calls them out! “And Elijah came near to all the people and said, “How long will you go limping between two different opinions? If the Lord is God, follow him; but if Baal, then follow him.” (1 Kings 18:21)

The people were not living distinctly. It was not obvious to the surrounding nations/people groups which God (or god) they served. Sound familiar? What in my life confuses people? Where do I say I follow YHWH, but also worship other things? Materialism? Success? Selfishness?


Partial Obedience
Another big theme in the OT is partial obedience. God over and over instructs the people of Israel to “destroy completely” a certain people group, nation, high places, etc and they only do so partially. And we learn right away that partial obedience is not obedience. As a result, you see certain nations that remain a thorn in Israel’s flesh.

Where in my life have obeyed some of what God has asked of me, but not all? I’ll surrender 9/10 of things to you oh LORD, but oh this ONE, this one I’ll keep?

Repentance
Our God is a relenting God. He provides many opportunities for His people to repent, to turn and follow Him wholeheartedly. He sends prophets to His people who have one message “repent and be saved!” and they don’t listen. God desires us to repent and follow Him with everything so much that He will wait as long as He possibly can before judgment.

Remnant
Though much of the nation followed after other gods, or only partially obeyed, or did not repent . . . there was a little population that did. The remnant of Israel. We read about it in Isaiah 4 and other places. Probably the most beautiful picture of this is in the book of Ruth. The book of Judges is full of darkness, sin, and depravity. It describes what happens when everyone does “what is right in their own eyes” (Judges 21:25). And then comes Ruth. A picture of this family who is faithful to follow YHWH and serve Him and Him alone.

I want to be a part of the Remnant. I want to know that in the midst of darkness, chaos, sin, and depravity in the culture around me, I can keep my eyes fixed on the LORD and follow Him and Him alone.

Needless to say, we were all desperate for some HOPE after reading through the Old Testament. Story after story of sin, and judgment, and baals, and high places, and wicked kings . . . we were all weary by the end and eager for a Savior!

Isn’t that the point? We should read through the text and wait eagerly for a Messiah!

I love how one of the gals in our group put it . . . “If you had told me the bible was this salacious and scandalous, I wouldn’t have believed you! It has some REALLY good books. The bible is totally underrated.”

Couldn’t agree more. What a joy to journey through the Old Testament together, now on to the NEW!

The Sin that God HATES

Do you know what sin God hates?

All over scripture you see this sin mentioned over and over. God aggressively opposed to the one who commits it.

This was the sin that the religious people just couldn't repent of that eventually nailed Jesus to the cross. This was the sin that kings committed that eventually led to the demise of kingdoms. This is the sin that all of us commit when we think we know what's best and have all the answers and follow our own ways.

Do you know which sin?

Leviticus 26:19
I will break the pride of your power, and I will make your heavens like iron and your earth like bronze.

2 Chronicles 26:16
But when he was strong, he grew proud, to his destruction. For he was unfaithful to the Lord his God . . .

Obadiah 1:3
The pride of your heart has deceived you, you who live in the clefts of the rock, in your lofty dwelling, who say in your heart, “Who will bring me down to the ground?”

Psalm 10:4
In the pride of his face the wicked does not seek him; all his thoughts are, “There is no God.”

Proverbs 8:13
The fear of the Lord is hatred of evil.
Pride and arrogance and the way of evil and perverted speech I hate.

Proverbs 11:2
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom.

Proverbs 16:5
Everyone who is arrogant in heart is an abomination to the Lord; be assured, he will not go unpunished.

Proverbs 16:18-19
Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall. It is better to be of a lowly spirit with the poor than to divide the spoil with the proud.

Proverbs 18:12
Before destruction a man's heart is haughty, but humility comes before honor.

Ecclesiastes 7:8
Better is the end of a thing than its beginning, and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit.

Isaiah 2:11
The haughty looks of man shall be brought low, and the lofty pride of men shall be humbled, and the Lord alone will be exalted in that day.

(And that's just some of the passages from the OT)

Pride:
A high or inordinate opinion of one's own dignity, importance, merit, or superiority.
Pleasure or satisfaction taken in something done by or belonging to oneself or believed to reflect credit upon oneself

Pride leads to destruction. It leads to distance from the LORD. It leads to discord among others. It leads to disgrace, and eventually it leads to death.

Pride was the reason Satan was cast out of Heaven . . . He wanted to make himself like the Most High God.
Pride is the reason Adam & Eve sinned, they thought they knew better than God. They thought their understanding was higher than His understanding.
Pride is the reason the Pharisees had Jesus crucified. Their law was higher than God's law. They couldn't stand the thought of not being declared righteous by their own doing, and couldn't stand Jesus opposition to their self righteous ways.
Pride is the reason for our sin too. We think our way & understanding is better, that we know more than God.

It can be subtle & secret or loud & public. It can be committed blindly or knowingly. It can sneak in our be found out. It is committed by the churched and unchurched alike. It is prevalent, relevant, and cancerous.

Do you have pride in your life?
Do you always have the right answers?
Is your way the right way?
Do you make decisions based on what you feel or think?
Are you self righteous? Do you feel superior to others?
How much of your thought life is consumed of self?

Pride separates.
Pride destroys.
Pride devours.
Pride grieves God.

"But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” (James 4:6)

“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven."
“Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted."
“Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth." (Matthew 5:3-5)

Is There Freedom in Choice?

As a woman who cannot bear children there is no bigger issue to me than the issue of abortion.



There is a huge trial going on right now for an abortionist who not only performed abortions, but actually killed babies after they were born. It’s horrifying. The stories, the details, the pictures are just horrifying.

And I just can’t understand.

How is it we value the sanctity of life for abandoned animals, but not for children who are alive in the womb? We live in a time where the abandoned baby whale gets more compassion than the aborted baby human. It is strange to me how the people who will fight to protect the environment, animals, even chain themselves to trees to prevent them from being cut down, are the same people who support the choice to abort human life?

And I find myself saying “How could they? How could anyone consider abortion the right thing to do? I long for a baby and yet women are just killing theirs left and right. How??”

And then I remember . . . I remember having the same feelings as those women in high school/college. I remember walking through the aftermath of abortion with friends. And I remember FEAR.

I don’t know if you’ve ever had an abortion or walked with someone who has, but I can tell you that the women I have walked with were left with every other feeling besides “freedom”. The women I know, who for whatever circumstance, have had an abortion, are left with feelings of guilt, shame, fear, regret, etc.

Many abortions stem from fear. One bad choice that leads to conception and a 16 year old feels like she has no other choice but to abort because her parents would disown her. Or the college age student who was taken advantage of, ended up pregnant, with not place to turn and no support from family, felt she had no other choice.

And I hurt for that.

We have provided a “choice” for women in these situations that in reality is no choice at all.

We have fought for the right to vote, the choice to get and education, to be a career woman, when to have sex, when and if to raise children, and when to keep or kill children.

Ladies, we fought the good fight for equality, freedom, choice, liberation, and now I wonder if we’ve gone too far?

I just wonder in our fight for freedom . . . freedom of choice, have we actually found ourselves in more bondage?

The bondage of pain, shame, guilt, and regret.

We have the freedom to choose and yet the choice is costly.

The woman (Norma McCorvey of Roe v. Wade) who originally fought for the right to have an abortion, has since denounced her position and is actively pro-life and is no longer in support of abortion. And I can’t help but wonder the reason? Perhaps there is more to it than the immediate choice made from fear?

I beg you women who would consider themselves pro-choice, to count the cost. Seek counsel, talk to women who have gone through abortions and listen to their heart afterward. Don’t let fear drive your decision. Consider listening to that baby’s heart beat just once. Consider adoption. Consider abstinence. Consider the grief you will experience. And consider Christ.

For the women who have gone through with the abortion, for my dear friends that I’ve walked with, consider Christ. He is the true liberator, the true place of freedom. He wants to provide healing for you and doesn’t intend for you to remain under the bondage of guilt, shame, fear, and regret for all of your life.

And for those who are pro-life, consider the women in these situations. Have you considered what they are going through? Have considered the fear they’re walking in? Have you considered that they feel they have nowhere else to turn? The condemnation we heap on them in church leaves them feeling like they have no other option.

Being pro-life is doing much more than protecting that unborn baby. It’s helping the mother through this difficult time. If we are truly “pro-life” what are we doing for that baby’s life? The mother’s life? Fostering? Adopting? Supporting?

It’s a painful mess out there. I fear that in our fight for choice, we’ve gone too far. We’ve chosen what makes sense to us, but our understanding is limited. We’ve thought the path to freedom is ending life. In reality, that is only the beginning of a life of bondage to pain.

Thankfully, the LORD is near, He can restore, heal, and redeem. It’s not too late, you’re not too far. There is one choice you can make that will provide true freedom. Choose Christ.

“13For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. 14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. 15 My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them. (Psalm 139:13-16)

“8 Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. 9 Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy. (Proverbs 31:8-9)

“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” (Romans 8:1)